Revenge ... seen as the only way of ... calming the inner daemons by the well known romanian author Adrian Dumitru
Revenge ... seen as the only way of ... calming the inner daemons by the well known romanian author Adrian Dumitru
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I continue my analysis... and the main thing which intrigues me is why the hell relationships stop working after a while ... even if that amazing connection that we see into the beginning looks so, so powerful.
What changes?!
Why all is beautiful ... and then toxic?!
Why we adore the partner ... and then we just ... hate?!
Why this weird emotional balance?!
And why people can endure such contradictory feelings .... but also how?!
More i analyse ... more I understand that many times ... we just love too much that story .... and simple can't say stop to it.
We feel ... imprisoned by powerful love emotions .... and ....
Unfortunately ... more i analyse live stories ... i become aware that revenge is actually ... the only medicine for the ego ... so that it will allow us to continue being into that relationship.
You see .... the passing of time ... proved me that theory one million times.
And ... i saw it into my life ... but also to many other people from the stage of my life.
Today ... i try to not judge anymore the revenge ... even if many times has the form of ... betrayal.
I try to not judge the others.
... but also to stop judging myself for using the revenge as a medicine administered to my ego .... so that i could calm the inner daemons and make then shut up in front of my life partners.
Yes ... i've came to this point of realising that maybe i should stop myself having this charade of the revenge in continuous form.
Maybe ... i need to be more realistic about myself .... and admit i have a disability of expressing all i want.
Say .... "Please stop doing that ... cause you will offend my daemons so, so much that i'll become a devil again .... and revenge on you.
I'll be that idiot again ... and you'll totally dislike it.
So ... don't do that to me anymore."
But ... i can't express myself into that way.
No ... i just can't.
In none of my relationships i could not do it.
That's maybe why i had become a writer .... writing my thoughts on and on and on ... like a self-therapy.
... cause i could not speak with all those love partners from my past.
I hated them for seeing that they just can't play the role of
the psychologist for my lost soul.
So .... I've revenged on them.
... on all of them.
I loved them ... but also hated them ... for not offering me all my ego desired.
Later on ... using the revenge as a medicine ... but in fact ... unconsciously ruin all.
Download the book ”Mr & Mrs FREUD
in love ... but still playing psychological games -
philosophical essays” written by the romanian essayist Adrian Dumitru for FREE.
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